It was 30 minutes until the first class meeting of the semester.
I chose my mother over my students.
I forgot to get my driving glasses; reading glasses will have to do.
When I arrived at the ER Cardiac room, she was just lying there.
I put her hand in mine, she opened her eyes,
Her look was shock and surprise, then the eyes went to a smile,
Then back to unresponsive.
The monitor above beeped as her heart rate dropped to the 60s,
Then a few minutes later rose to 130s, then down again.
For two hours I held her hand, stroking her fragile bruised skin.
Suddenly she woke up, fully, asking where she was.
Asking why she was there. I called the nurse.
She said she was dreaming of being chased.
She didn't know who was chasing her.
The nurse and doctor came; she joked, she obfuscated.
She slurred her words. She didn't know my name.
The tests all came back negative - no stroke, no heart attack.
There is no explanation for her becoming unresponsive.
The decision is made to send her back to the nursing home.
She wants to come to my house - not the nursing home.
It takes three nurses using a Hoyer to move her.
Two hours later, she no longer has the ability to talk;
She tries finger spelling, but we don't understand.
As she moans and cries in pain, we have to leave.
I'm sorry, mom, I cry as I drive away.
How much more can she or I take?